Julia's Mexico City

Weigh In Wednesday On Thursday

Holy crap that little otter is cute! 

It's Thursday and I slept in yesterday and forgot to weigh in before having coffee. I weighed in today at 189, up three from two weeks ago. I'm not surprised as I've had a busy couple of weeks not working and not being on any kind of regular schedule. 

Having a full time job helps so much in the "control the eating" world of my weight loss. I had only what I brought with me to eat and if I only brought carrots and edamame as a snack after beans and rice for lunch, then that's all I had! 

Last week I was in No. Cal visiting my niece and nephew and while I didn't overeat, I didn't eat really well. Still very little in the meat/dairy category so that was good. This week has been filled with friends visiting from out of town, lunches and dinner out. Tuesday was Pizza day as Shana and I went to LaRocco's Pizzeria in Culver City and scarfed down much deeeeeelicious pizza! I haven't had pizza in about six months and it's one of my all time favorite foods. Plus LaRocco's makes their crust with NY water flown in special so it's perfect. Man oh man, get down there if you want great pizza!! The owners are parents of one of my college roommates so they plied us with extra yummy bread and a whole other pie to take home to Kurt. So I had pizza for lunch, pizza for dinner and a snack of bread in between. Hmmm, I wonder why I weigh more today....??? I wouldn't have changed a thing! YUM!

I'm trying to get settled back into a routine in my non-full-time-office job life, I'm going to get more carrots to cut into sticks and have edamame handy for snacks. But then next week we are going to Vegas for two nights (which doesn't mean I have to eat poorly, but it's going to be, uh, different!) and then a week after that we go to Seattle for a week. Whew. August is going to be about clear broth and celery. Okay, but not like this.

I'll be getting back on track and even in the wacky schedules of life, I'm amazed at how I don't miss the meat or the dairy (except for the cheese on the pizzza...mmmmm....pizza good!). Of course there are *plenty* of things that can make me gain weight outside of those two categories so I'm never off the hook there.

Seriously, that little otter face up there needs some major SMOOOOCHES!

Busy Day

My friend Steve signed off on his email to me today with this:

Yes, busy day for me as well. I am almost done curing cancer and then I am taking lunch with Obama, albeit a short one....have to keep my afternoons free as I am devoted to solving cold fusions issues then. Don't worry, I have plenty of free time and I often devote that to solving the staging problems in Ibsen's "Peer Gynt".  Can't hold me down, I'm a free spirit.

LOVE getting emails from Steve.

The Week I Had

It started last week with a trip up north to help celebrate Grace's 21st Birthday. Amazing to me that she already is 21. It was a lot of fun with a few bittersweet moments thrown in for good measure. We went Macy's to the Mac counter so Grace could get some "Going Out On The Town" make up done and I got new eyeshadow and false eyelashes! I've never had them before and that was wacky good fun. See?

Grace had a fun night, though with a bit of, ahem, overindulgence toward the end. Matthew was an awesome brother and stayed up late to pick up all the 21 and overs from their night of debauchery. Good man, Matthew!

I left on Friday and while it was a good visit, there is much healing that needs to be done in that family. My brother in law is not doing well, still deeply grieving. (I'm being extremely polite here, but I'm not ready to dig too deep on this topic at the moment. If you see me real life, you can ask me all about it.)

The important part is, Grace and Matthew are two amazing, smart, talented, wonderful people and I am so proud to be their aunt. 

❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧

I woke up Friday morning, the 3rd of July, prepping for the drive home and when I checked my email, there were four comments for my other blog, Safety Graphic Fun. I have a few regular readers who occasionally send in funny comments, but have never received four at once from total strangers. I checked my referral page (to see how people got to my site) and lo and behold, my site had been listed on CNN.com as one of "Ten Humor Sites Sure to Make You LOL." OMGWTFBBQPONIES!!!!!11!!1! Click here to read it! It's a blogger's dream come true! Well, when Boing Boing posts about me, then I'll truly be in nerd heaven.

My traffic started going through the roof as I prepared for the six hour drive home. I posted on the facebook fan page and sent something out on twitter, but then had to hit the road. When I got home, I had over 80,000 hits for Friday alone! Then yesterday I got over 172,000 hits! DUDE! My mind is blown and I'm so appreciative of the traffic and new fans and most especially for all the people who are sending in their own images of wacky safety graphics for me to post. That is fantastic.

Is there a downside you ask? Not much of one because it is easy to avoid, but occasionally some assclown will send in a comment that is just rude, obnoxious or generally unnecessary. We (us bloggers) call these individuals "trolls" and when you follow one of the first rules of blogging, you are fine. That rule? "Don't Feed The Trolls." Their words can sting or be annoying, but then you commiserate with other bloggers and all is well.

There is a funny side to all the comments, though for most of the commenters I refer to, it's not funny. But here goes.  99% of the women who comment either just say how hard they are laughing or add an additional funny comment about the particular safety graphic they are commenting on. However, 85% of the men who comment tell me what the safety graphic really means. Or they don't get my humor and explain why my "comments" are not funny or why I am wrong.  My favorite of all time, and most commented on posting is about me and my French language skills. Kurt and I have been howling with laughter as each new person writes in with their correct translation. You can read them all right here. 

There have also been a couple of physicists and audio engineers who have explained things to me about my blog. I *do* appreciate how well educated my readers are. I do. Now if we could just improve their humor education, we'd be doing extremely well! Again, not complaining about the traffic, just amused and observing of these trends!

I'm excited and curious about what kind of traffic tomorrow will bring. Friday was a holiday and while there was much traffic, it did slow down today. *Only* 40,000 hits today. I'm hoping tomorrow there will be a full compliment of office workers checking their bookmarked websites before work actually starts and that they find my site...Can't wait for the new comments!

Lastly, I'm SO STOKED that on that list of Ten sites, four of them (not including my own) were sites that I visit often! To be included in  that company of hysterical blogs makes me even more pleased and proud. 

❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧

Driving home on Friday I got a speeding ticket! This is the first -- FIRST -- speeding ticket I've ever had in the state of California in 25 years! 83 in a 65 on the 101. Does that seem fast to you? That's NORMAL for driving home from the Callahan's. I've set my cruise control for 85 at times. The cop was nice, funny and asked at one point "Why so fast?" and I shrugged and said "New car?" I had to call people immediately to tell on myself and laugh.

And no, I wasn't even listening to Green Day at that point. I was listening to a podcast of This American Life!

Today Kurt was out having a work/writing afternoon and texted me on the way home. He said, "Guess who's getting a speeding ticket?" HA HA HA!! He was going like 90 on the 10. He used the "New Car" defense and the cop gave him a slight break by making the ticket for 80 in a 65. 

Go GTI!! 6th gear will get you! It's hard not to be zippy in that car...

❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧ ❉ ✿ ✤ ❀ ✧

Tomorrow is Monday. I'm not working!!!! Yay! There is plenty of blog work to do -- new images to sort, emails to answer, blog posts to create for the next few weeks. I have to update Hot Dog Death March and get the donated money to the charity as promised. FUN work! Love it love it love it.

Traffic Up The Yin Yang!

HOLY GUACAMOLE!

Thanks to CNN my Safety Graphic Fun traffic is insane!  WOOO!

More on this tomorrow, I just got home from up north and then dinner out with friends.

80,000 hits just TODAY?!?!  Wow!

Celebrity Deaths

Ed McMahon was sick, Farrah was sick. These reports were sad to hear. Michael Jackson was a shocker, but on some level not entirely out of left field. That guy seemed to have faded from my radar for a long time. I felt very sorry for him and whatever his life had been, clearly there were major issues. And listening to all that amazing music made me sad that he couldn't ever recover from being so up and then so DOWN. 

But I wasn't really so touched or sad or disturbed. I think that there is so much immediate grieving still going on in my own life and family that a stranger's sudden death, albeit a famous stranger, doesn't have the impact it might have had before April 2008. But even then, Kurt and I were watching stories and remembrances for all three over the weekend and Kurt said he couldn't think of a celebrity who had died that made him really sad. Which made me think of the only time I got weepy when I heard of a celebrity who died.

Jim Henson.

I was working at my first real post-college job in 1990, feeling sort of finally kind of grown up, living on my own, making money, being very responsible at age 23, when I heard the news. It broke my heart because it was a significant part of my childhood -- Sesame Street and The Muppet Show. His work on these shows have given me sweet wonderful memories of perfect childhood days and nights. And now I was a grown up and his death was a hard reminder of how I could never really go back. (His death was too soon as well, he was only 53.) 

If you are of my age/generation, tell me you don't get a little misty watching Bid Bird sing "It's Not Easy Being Green" at Jim Henson's memorial. And if you don't then tell me what celebrity death has made you stop in your tracks and put your hand to your heart.

Punk Rock And Me

Yeah. I'm not really that punk rock. More of a poser really. But listening to Green Day (I know, I know, bear with me...) has really made me feel good. I think it's because I can sing/shout and pound my hands on my steering wheel to the music, which is "acceptable" in our society. Really what I want to do is scream and yell and break things and run and run and run until I can't run anymore, until I can barely breath. 

Most of it is my sister being dead. How could she leave me and my mom and her kids this way? How could she be so selfish? The preppie-square in me says: Stop it. You are the one being selfish. I say: Fuck you, square-preppie me, I'm pissed off, leave me alone.

  

I want to pound on the drums, which really means I want to break things. There is so much to get out. But in moments of mellow-ness, when the volume on 21st Century Breakdown is not rattling the windows in the car, I think: Okay, I can't suddenly be a rock and roll drummer and sit down at a drum kit and beat out some cathartic rhythms. What can I do? How can I express all this? Writing. How can I be a punk writer? Wait, do I have to be a punk writer? Doesn't that mean I just want to be HONEST? 

Yes, that's it. Honest. True. Harsh even, in some situations. My punk side says: Stop being such a pussy and write what you feel! My preppie-square side says: ooooh, scary!

Time to really get over it. Stop being so afraid. 

Time to bang out some truth.

Friday = Free Day!

Friday was my last day at work! 16 weeks are now complete and HOORAY! I'm very grateful for the job because it helped us get ALL of our credit cards paid off! (The last payment goes out next week!) Very Very grateful for that. It also helped us buy a new car, also a very good and needed thing.

Friday they had a party at work (no, not for me) and some of the story artists in the animation department were doing caricatures so I had mine done. See how happy I am on Friday? 

The guy got my crooked mouth just right!

I was also happy because my new good friend Suzanne had a going away party for me in her office:

It was just the two of us but it was a great party!

When I got home my sister Dor had sent me this LOLcat she had made for me:

That is just about how it felt!

I DO haz freedom!!

Good Dental Hygiene

Had my 6 month cleaning yesterday. Took a self portrait because I blog. I'm also a bit vain about my teeth. Physically, it's the only thing I'm vain about. Cue Carole King Carly Simon because I probably thought this blog was about me. 

Oh, it is.

Plus, it's a decent photo of me. Best photo of me having my teeth cleaned, that is for sure. 

I really recommend flossing. 

Weigh In Wednesday

Scale says 186 again this week. Maintenance and consistency are not bad things. I hit 185 during the week so I know things are still moving downward on the scale. 

Here's the amazing thing, it's been about eight weeks (or more?) since I started on the plant based program. Over that time, I have had some meat and a tiny bit of fish and a skosh of cheese and dairy. In fact I had ice cream this week and it was okay, but not super satisfying. I think I only had it out of habit as Kurt was having some (a special treat from Baskin and Robins). 

I don't miss the meat and I don't miss the dairy. At all. Maybe it's because I have had enough here and there to feel quite satisfied, not like I'm 100% denying myself. Maybe because all the different recipes I've tried are so yummy and satisfying that I don't even think about meat or dairy anymore. 

No matter what, I feel pretty good about it all and don't feel like I'm "on a diet" of any kind. I could probably eat a little bit less in general, but I'm still pleased with my progress!

Dreamland

I wrote the following to my mom this morning, and as I was writing about it, wanted to post it here as well.

Last night I dreamt I was in a HUGE craftsman style house -- 3 or 4 times bigger than G. Jane's Makawao house (which was a 3 story, 5 bedroom, huge old house). I was someone's guest and I knew they had a baby (maybe it was Jen's? or Cynthia's?) and I knew the baby hadn't been seen for a while. I was walking down an upstairs hallway, going down to the ground floor, there were friendly dogs hanging out with me and as I went down the stairs I heard very faint crying. I stopped and thought, hmmmm, it's not my baby, I shouldn't do anything. But then I knew that there was no one else so I paused and went closer to the doors and could tell the baby had been crying and neglected for a long time that day. So I went into the amazingly furnished room through the large glass french doors and the baby (I think boy) stood up in his very fashionable designer crib painted in period greens and browns with fancy pillows and trimmings. He was crying and crying and crying and my heart just melted. I went right over and reached out to him. He didn't reach back, just kept wiping his eyes and I picked him up and comforted him and hugged and hugged him and started to take him downstairs with me. 

I woke up feeling like -- uh oh, my creative babies are feeling very neglected and are crying out to me!

And no mistake that it was a "crafts" man house.

No surprise as yesterday on NPR they mentioned a short story contest they are having this summer and when I heard that I knew instantly what the story was that I would enter. It's been sitting in rough form in my inbox on my desk for months -- a year?  More? I then sorta half blew off the idea of working on it and sending it in. Until this morning, after that dream. So I got up and typed up the handwritten notes and will work on it and I will send it in.

Funny thing -- the story is based on a dream too!

Time to blow the cobwebs out of my imagination and get it sparked and running again.

Body Surfing As Metaphor

When I would go visit my dad and stepmom and sisters in the summer on the Big Island we would often go to the beach at Hapuna. Back then there was only the Mauna Kea Hotel at the Kawaihae side and those funky A-frame cabin things you could camp in near the parking lot. It was a great beach for body surfing though it was occasionally scary for me as I was only about nine or ten when we started going and when I felt like a strong enough swimmer to go out into the surf. 

Most of the time it was fine, but every once in a while you'd get pushed under in the middle of a set, tumbling and swirling in the foam. Then you'd come up gasping for breath only to see another wave pounding down at you and under you would go again, eyes wide open but seeing nothing but foam and feeling the wave go over. Up again to snatch more air and another wave was coming right at you, down again into the tumble. Once more up and sucking in air hoping the set was past so you could catch your breath and ride a few of the easy waves. Or depending on how you felt, get out of the water for a while and just lie on the steady, solid warm sand. 

2008 was like that for me and Kurt. Barely coming up for breath before the next wave hit. It was really scary at times. I didn't know if I could hold my breath that long or if I could find the surface again. Yet, just like at Hapuna, I always did. I don't know if having been pushed under so many times gives you confidence. Fear is still there when you are out of control in the turbulent waters, but knowing what it feels like helps you to know that you will come up for air again, more than likely. The survival instinct and that way nature is always trying to balance things are big helps.

2008 was a long bad set of nasty waves. There's been some easier, gentler waves in the last six months, but I can see that big set outside. There is turbulence ahead but I am better at diving under the waves and getting a breath before diving under the next one but you can never predict how a wave will be. I just hope this set is not as big as it looks. 

Never take your eyes off the ocean.

Fathers Day -- It's Complicated

It's complicated. Even when I look at friends who seem to have very normal relationships with their dads I'm sure there must be a story in there that makes it complicated. Or maybe not, maybe their relationships are picture postcard worthy and I'm a little jealous. 

My dad died three years ago this summer but it's been much longer than that since I've said Happy Fathers Day to him as he had Alzheimers for four or five years before that. In a way it was a relief to stop sending him cards and gifts because I was never quite sure what to say. It wouldn't be the truth to say "You've always been the greatest Dad!" No dad is. And my dad was complicated. 

Being older and wiser now and having worked hard to understand why my dad was the way he was, I knew he did the best he could with what he had. Right before he started his downhill slide into Alzheimers I got a chance to ask him about his father and mother and stepmother and about his real life growing up. It was not pretty for him and I finally saw him for what he really was deep down: a scared little boy. I'm sorry I couldn't know that or even understand it until it was just about too late to have a changed relationship with him. And even though he's gone, I am still working to have a good relationship with him in my heart. I'm human too and there is still lots of work to do there.

I learned lots of good things from my dad, directly and indirectly. I'm glad I learned to swim as young as I did and to be on a team for a long time. I'm glad I learned how to fly, for that short little while. I didn't get the benefit of his love for music, like Dor did. But that came from not living with him, which in the long run is just fine. It's funny, I can tell you with great certainty all the personality traits I've picked up from my mom, but with my dad it's not so easy. I know for sure I got his chin, his thumbs and the Rivas Big Toe. There are time when I'm being stubborn and a know-it-all and I think, "Oh, that's the part of dad that made me cringe, I have to stop that." And there are times when I'm trying to tell a good story and wish I could do it as well as Carlos did. I know he was a voracious reader and that is something I am as well and I'm so glad. 

Do I miss him? That's a tough one. I wish we had had more time to get to know each other with me as a grown up and having understood him better. But I am grateful we had a small window of understanding. I know he loved me very much. I know it because he told me often. I also know he was very proud of me because he told me directly and because he bragged about me to strangers on airplanes or at movie theaters and then told me about that. I have no doubt about those things. 

It's complicated.

Dad, I hope you are somewhere enjoying a good round of golf, a nice sail around a beautiful island and listening to your favorite music.

Friday Musings on Music and Grief

@traviskoplow tweeted:

When I'm stressed I listen to the same music over and over. This week, Gang of Four. Over and over. I think it's some mild autism thing.

I think it's perfectly normal. 

Though lately with grief, it's almost harder to listen to music because it opens up so many floodgates of memories and emotion. Sometimes you need some distance. But when I worked at Imagworks in the 90's and especially on the two big FX Producing jobs I did here, Contact and Godzilla, I listened to comfort music. 

On Contact I would come in really early, like at 5:30, to get three hours of uninterrupted work time in. (I shared a big office with three other people.) I might listen to classical or movie soundtracks -- soothing background sounds. But there were days when only "Southern Cross" by Crosby, Stills and Nash would do. Not the album it's on. Just that one song. Over and over and over. It made me think of Hawaii and the ocean and night time. Specifically it reminded me of going on the trip to Kahoolawe my senior year of high school when we took a huge catamaran over at 3am and you could see the southern cross on the way over. That was a strange and great trip.

On Godzilla it was Madonna Ray of Light -- the whole album this time. I would just play the whole thing on repeat most afternoons. I love that album to this day. It's my favorite of Madge's.

Now, of course you know of my current obsession with Green Day. There are days when I most love the song with the first line "I'm Not Fucking Around!" If you are in a mood, that is a great one to sing along to. Anger issues much? Perhaps and I'm working my way around to expressing them better in writing. Just not today. Thanks Green Day. 

(We got our tickets to the concert, by the way. YAY!)

            

Speaking of grief, a blogger friend's mom died a few weeks ago, unexpectedly. I have been thinking about him and how he's doing almost every day. Then yesterday I heard here at work that Jesus, the maintenance guy who's been here since I was here in 1996, his father died. Someone was taking a collection of money to help him get back to Mexico so I ran down to throw a bunch of money in the pot.

Because it's been ten years since I've been here full time, I hardly know anyone in the building anymore and they don't know me, which is fine. What is pleasantly surprising is that the parking attendants, the maintenance crew and the recycle collectors are all the same and I know them and often chat with them, catching up about their families, etc. They are like the foundation here, the one constant that doesn't seem to change. It's comforting. Which is why when I heard about Jesus, my heart was in my throat thinking about him going home for his dad's funeral. 

Weigh In Wednesday

Good morning! The scale read 186 today, good for me. Down another from last week, even with the hot dog a palooza and etc over the weekend. Last week was very busy with work and event planning and I didn't eat as well as I normally do, though I still didn't eat much outside of the plan (until Saturday and Sunday).  So Sunday night I made the veggie lasagna and will have it for lunch often this week. I also bought stuff for veggie sandwiches to take to work. It's also nice not to spend so much money on lunch.

Last night I dreamt I was running. I felt fast and fleet and fit. (though fast is something I've never been! I'm all about the long distance/slow and steady...) It was a nice reminder of where I can get back to.

I've lost 14 pounds since Christmas. Good for me. The hard part is, I start feeling like "I did it! My clothes are looser and I don't feel as squishy!" but then I see photos of me from last Saturday's event -- where I'm clearly having fun, which is what it is all about! -- and think, "Okay, we have much work to do yet." And I'll do it.

I didn't reach my goal of 183 by June 13. So I will reset the goal and say 182 (or less) by July 15. 

By the way, I just love this picture of the baby giraffe being weighed. He's all long and floppy and I love the parent's giraffe heads looking over the fence in back. I want to hug a baby giraffe.

Emerging From The Hot Dog Induced Haze

Last Saturday was the big event I'd been working on for the last 1-2 months: Hot Dog Death March! 

It was a rip-roaring success and I'm pleased to hear people asking me and Lucinda what next year's March will be. Whew, thank goodness I don't to think about that right away (though I am making notes for next time...)

Thanks to Lucinda we got some GREAT press! Check us out on page 1 of the LA Times weekly supplement Brand X:

Lucinda and I laughed ourselves silly taking those photos a week before the blessed event. Check out the flickr group site here to see TONS of great photos. Thanks to everyone who came along or even those who were there in spirit! On Sunday I was WIPED OUT. I forget how tiring it is to be ON for hours at a time. The turn out was about 50 people at our peak time. The only downside was I only had one hot dog. One simple, ketchup and relish hot dog all day. I had two bites of a chili dog, and a few of Mykal's french fries at Skooby's (which are so delicious!). I'll just have to go back!

The same weekend, my mom was at her 50th high school reunion on Oahu. She had a great time and I'm so glad she stayed longer than planned. I can't imagine my class at Seabury after 50 years, would we actually get together? So small and all...

Sunday morning for breakfast I went off the Engine 2 program some more with french toast, scrambled eggs and bacon for breakfast at our favorite diner, Norm's. Mmmmm. But I did feel a bit gross after, which is such a good thing since I don't much eat that way any more. (Hot dog events not withstanding.) On the table at the restaurant was this sign: 

Um, ew! Baja shrimp cocktail and an eclair. Just the kind of combo to make you lose your lunch.

And my love for Keyboard Cat continues with this most recent edition:

Work is almost done and I'm looking forward to being able to focus more on my creative writing, blogging, social networking and other food events. Being social is my thing and I love putting people together. The internets are really great for meeting people and arranging events that would have been so much harder to do just a few short years ago...

This blog post is sort of all over the place. Oh well. The hot dog haze will clear soon!

On Hard Days And Being Strong

I took one of those silly Facebook quizzes recently and one of the questions was "how do you see yourself" and the answers were Strong, Playful, Loyal, Giving, etc etc. I answered "Strong." The next question was "how do others see you" with the same list of answers. I thought a bit and answered "Strong" again. 

The amount of emotional pressure one person can take without breaking is amazing. And I'm one of those people, but some days I want to just run away. Yesterday was one of those days. The morning started out with tough, intense conversations with my brother-in-law and then later my niece. I had to close my office door and use up a bunch of kleenex. Those conversations weighed heavy on me all day, and they still do. I'm a problem solver and I have no idea how to solve those problems. I also have to remember that it's not really up to me to solve these problems. Of course the biggest problem is that my sister is dead. That one is unsolvable. Fack.

Last night we went to a party at a friend's house who's husband just got his PhD. We have not been in that group of friends and acquaintances in at least three or four years. So it didn't dawn on me until we were getting ready to go to their house that there was the possibility of having to talk about my sister having died. Luckily no one asked about her specifically but everyone I saw did ask "It's been so long since I've seen you, what have you been doing these past few years?" Uuuhhhhhhh. "Just working, doing some blogging, writing, working in FX." Never was there a more heavy unspoken sentence. The party was fine, it was just very very very heavy on my heart. Still is. I don't even know if the friend who invited us knows about my sister. And they had met many times.

So, I'm strong. Great. 

I have to remember to take care of myself as best I can. One way I'll have to be doing that is to get a night guard from my dentist. I can tell I've been grinding my teeth A LOT lately. My jaw is sore in the mornings and I find I have to consciously relax it during the days at work. 

Another way to take care of myself is to have a lot of fun and to keep doing the things I love to do. And today is going to be full of fun at Hot Dog Death March. 

Rock and Roll!

This is what I look like in my new car, with the ten speakers, listening to Green Day on the way to work. 

No seriously...

Weigh In Wednesday

Scale read 187, same as last week, though I did hit 186 a few times during the week. I don't believe I'll hit my goal of 183 by Saturday, but I'm still very pleased at the progress I've made. More than anything, the quality of food I'm eating has gotten so much better, tons of greens and veggies and good fiber.

Clothes fit or are loose now, that is always encouraging as well!

When Hot Dog Death March is over this weekend, I will set a new goal!

Two Of My Favorite Things of 2009 TOGETHER!

How can you NOT love Green Day when they do THIS?!

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Exclusive - Play Him Off, Keyboard Cat
colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Stephen Colbert in Iraq

Green Day does Keyboard Cat!

Seeing "Up" While Grieving

**Please don't read this blog post if you haven't seen the movie and don't want any bit spoiled for you.**

It was tough. 

The movie itself is great, funny and gorgeous to look at. 

But I highly recommend if you are in mourning of some kind to know that (spoiler alert) it is about death and grief and working your way up from those things.

The first 15 minutes had me silently sobbing behind my 3d glasses. Then the more typical Pixar movie took off and there was much fun and laughter. Then toward the end when the old man reads through the adventure book I was totally losing it again. We got home and I was doing the dishes and thinking about that part and the message that Ellie left for him about how much she loved her adventure and for him to go on a new one. It's wonderful but still so brutally sad because whatever adventure you go on next, you want to share it with that person more than anything.

My sister didn't like to travel much, but she seemed interested in all the places I went or was planning to go. And I always knew she would like to get postcards from me. There are still so many adventures I have yet to go on and it's hard to think about not sharing that with her. And that just makes me so sad.

Go see Up. Just be prepared if you are grieving.