Re-Entry is a Bitch
May 27, 2021
When this pandemic started last year, when it was an EMERGENCY, life was easier.
Okay, "easier" might be the wrong word. I should say life was more clear-cut.
Stay home. Wash your hands often for 20 seconds. Only go shopping when absolutely necessary. Wear a mask outside. Use hand sanitizer. Keep your distance! Learn how to zoom!
And so we did. We adjusted. It was a rough adjustment to be sure, but the rules were pretty clear.
We got good at it. Harper learned how to have remote school. I learned how to supervise remote school. I made summer camp for her last year and came up with some fantastic things to do. Kurt shopped at Trader Joe's like a hero. We did meal planning and tried lots of new recipes and baked things we had never baked before. (Why haven't I made that Japanese milk bread again??)
We waited for good news about the vaccine and we got it! Now we have been vaccinated for a while and feel a little more free to move about. LAUSD figured out a way to get kids back to school in a modified manner and that's been going well - weekly on-campus testing, social distancing, etc etc.
All that emergency stress and anxiety and adrenaline is still surging on some levels. You can't turn it off like a spigot. I feel much more relaxed about popping over to the store any old time to pick up eggs and milk if we need them. I stopped wearing my mask when I go for my long walks, though I carry one with me and still give space when I walk past other people.
Harper is not vaccinated so we can't just do whatever we like any time we like. There is still caution and care taken whenever we all go somewhere. We went out for dinner a few weeks ago, to a lovely outdoor restaurant (one that was built that way, not just taking over a sidewalk and lane of traffic). It was great! But it didn't feel "normal" yet.
Will it ever feel "normal"?
We are going to visit my mom in July and I find myself already planning exactly how to be on the plane with Harper and will be making the rules clear to her as we go. (Double mask on the plane, very little eating/drinking while in flight, throw masks away immediately upon arrival, etc etc).
I'd rather be over cautious than not. And its going to be a long long while before my shoulders and lower back fully relax. Even after Harper gets her vaccination at some point, I will continue to wear a mask inside places we go to. It might just be a placebo at that point, but you know what? Fine.
Also, I got a fish. He's my kitchen friend and I love talking to him.
Also also, my gardenia plant bloomed for the first time since I planted it about 2 years ago and OMG I'M SO HAPPY.
But still a bit anxious at times.