Things Harper Says - Spring 2018 Edition

 

Harper referred to Willoughby's litter box as her 

 

G L I T T E R  B O X

 

(I think I'll start a new company...)

 

 

Later that same morning she asked:

"How come numbers never end?"

 

 

 

And best of all was at her swimming lesson.

The swimming teacher called me over to tell me this story:

Harper told him her birthday is in December. He said, "Oh so you're a Sagittarius?"

Harper said, "No we celebrate Christmas and Easter." 

 

(Whaaaa? How does she even know to say it like that? Genius.)

 

34 Years Ago Today...

...Seabury Hall had a dance, planned and executed by the Social Committee, headed by - guess who? - that's right - ME.

On February 15, 1984, we put on a Valentine's Dance and I made mix tapes for them. Two mix tapes to be exact: #1 called "New Music" and #2 called "Harder Rock". 

(Quick thing to point out: Seabury back then was 7-12 grades, about 200 students total. And we had dances every month or six weeks and everyone could come, very casual, you didn't have to ask anyone or dress up or anything. We also had a prom in the spring every year which was just for 10-12 graders and it was very fancy.) 

So, here is my Mix for:

(All spellings as per the paper label inside. Gosh-my all caps handwriting hasn't changed at all!)

A SIDE:

Bowie - Modern Love 

English Beat - Jeannette

Madness - Madness

Rod Stewart - Young Turks

Squeeze - Piccadilly

Pretenders - Pack It Up

Men W/O Hats - Ideas For Walls

Duran - Lonely In Your Nightmares

BowWowWow - I Want Candy

Culture Club - Karma Chameleon

Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself

B SIDE:

Duran - Is There Something I Should Know

Stray Cats - Rebels Rule

Rob Stewart - Tonight I'm Yours

BowWowWow - Louis Quatorze

Bill Idol - Baby Talk

Bowie - Without You

Stray Cats - Sexy & 17

Duran - Girls On Film

Led Zepplin - Stairway to Heaven**

Billy Idol - Mony Mony

 

**All my Seabury Peeps will understand the inclusion of this song 

 

Let's get to the Harder Rock! (OMG can't wait for this, I haven't read this list yet.)

 

A SIDE:

Rod Stewart - Baby Jane 

Led Zepplin - Black Dog

The Who - Who Are You

Van Halen - Jump

U-2 - Sunday Bloody Sunday

Foreignor - Head Games

Black Sabbath - Mob Rules

Soft Cell - Frustration

Thompson Twins - Love On Your Side

Madness - Our House

 

B SIDE:

Pretenders - Bad Boys Get Spanked!

Led Zepplin - Rock and Roll

Joan Jett - I Love Rock And Roll

AC DC (I wrote it with the bolt in between!) - For Those About To Rock

Alice Cooper - Schools Out...

Kajagoogoo - Too Shy

Thompson Twins - We Are Detective

U-2 - Refugee

Forgeignor - Dirty White Boy

Alice Cooper - I'm 18

AC DC - Let's Get It Up

 

Okay I think we can all agree that the "er" in "Harder Rock" was critical in that description...! 

Wow that takes me back. And now I have Rod Stewart stuck in my head. Of all the songs from these lists. {eyeroll}

I'll make a spotify playlist for you later so you can enjoy it out loud. Check back in a bit for that. 

Oh the 80's on Maui...

 

 

 

 

Things Harper Says - 6 Year Old Edition

Harper has a t-shirt that says a bunch of positive things on it and I was reading it to her and one of the words was "Bold".

H - I'm not bold.

Me -  Yes you are, you are not afraid to try new things or--

H - No Mama, I'm not bold!

Me - ??

H - I'm not bold, I have hair!

 

A few weeks later I'm at my desk, writing in my journal and she asked what I was doing, what this book was. 

Me - It's my journal, my diary.

H - It's not a diary.

Me - what do you mean?

H - Diary is wet poop.

I about fell on the floor laughing so hard.

 

It was a good few months for learning about homonyms.

Just Don't Do It

You may have seen them in magazines. You might have thought - dang, that looks cool and when I need to replace my regular old stupid toilet, I'm going to do something extraordinary. 

Before you do it, call me. Call me and ask, "What was it like? For 3 weeks?" and I will tell you "Thank god we had a 2nd bathroom." 

SQUARE TOILETS ARE CRAP! Seriously. There is a reason toilets are round. Don't argue, don't try to be "cool" or "fashionable". Just go with the usual thing because it is "standard" for a very good reason.*

*Your ass is round! All our asses are round!

That Other Online Place Where I Write Things

I'm on facebook and have some fun and lively interactions there. I'm not really 100% sold on facebook, I use it warily and my "security" settings are pretty tight. (I don't really believe I have much security there.) There have been some hilarious images being shared on FB and I wanted to put some here.

The whole Kim Davis (I'm not linking, you can google it) ridiculousness has been amusing for the memes it generates. Like the serious ones:

 

But more than that one, I really enjoyed the on-point, but hilarious ones:

 

Smart memes just make my day.

Here's another image I had to share about life in general these days. This is THE TRUTH!

 

And lastly I wrote about a comment made to me by a valet guy on recent evening. He was returning the GTI to me - six speed manual transmission (or "Stick" as we like to say) and as he got out he said: “I like the 6 speeds!” And I said, “I know, right?” and he said “It’s cool you know how to drive it!”

At first I felt a bit insulted, but not long after I posted that interaction, I realized it was a compliment. I felt insulted because of my own occasional low self-esteem. Middle age is a tough place to be (especially while I'm so overweight) and so when a 20 year old guy tells me something like that I imagine how he pictures me - like someone who could be his mom - and he's surprised that I know how to do something cool like drive a six speed stickshift car.

But you know what? I am goddamn cool!

I Want To Call Saul

We are huge Breaking Bad fans. When we heard there would be a spin-off about Saul, we were excited and now that it is on, we love it. I love it. Any time we sit down to watch something, it's usually a choice between Justified (which I also adore) and Better Call Saul. I always pick Saul. Kurt said last night, "You like Saul." But I don't. I'm more like Holly Hunter in Raising Arizona:

So Much For The Kessel Run*

 

*I'm glad Mr. Ford is going to make a full recovery...

This Makes Me Laugh

They Still Make That??

I was in the hair color section the other day, just browsing for temporary color. (Didn't find/buy any.) But I did run across this and man oh man did that take me back. I wonder how many bottles I bought in my teens/20s? Good times.

Friday Tableau

We have a wonderful cleaning woman. I love to see how she leaves Harper's room. This was particularly fun.

Also on Friday we got our chimney swept for the first time in about five or six years. We don't do many fires but on rainy cold nights it's really nice.