Look How Fat I Was*

MyMarlin*I was not fat.

But boy oh boy, I thought I was. This was me in 8th grade with the first and only marlin I've ever caught. 175 pounds (technically a "rat" in the big game fish world). My dad was friends with the captain, Ben Baldwin (in the boat behind me) and the fish were biting like mad in Kona for a few weeks. Dad called to say, "Come over and catch one!" so I did. An unusual weekend visit to the Big Island during school.

Catching a marlin is hard, btw. It took 20 minutes to reel it in. And as the angler, you have to sit in the chair and do all the work yourself, just in case it is a record breaking fish. (Record breaking fish are 1000 pounds or more, just so you get why this one is called a "rat".) The crew on the boat, all experienced anglers, coach and cheer you on while you do it. It was a blast and I was really excited. 

But back to the fat part. Where did I get the idea that I was fat, ugly, unattractive, etc etc? So sad that I had no confidence in my strong body (well, maybe a bit more after wrestling that fish in). I am working so hard now, almost 40 years later, to feel good about who I am, what I look like and to not say a damn negative thing about myself in front of Harper. Even when she pokes my fat tummy and says "big tummy!" How do I create confidence in her? How do we help her know she's beautiful, inside and out? How do we make sure that when she looks at a picture of herself in 8th grade she thinks, "damn, I look great!" 

I will keep working to make it happen!

Also, in the last few years, I weigh lot more than that rat fish did. And I bought a bikini last year because F*UCK IT. Life if short. It feels good to just enjoy being at a beach or pool. Maybe that's the best way to teach Harper. 

We Also Do Things Without Harper

Because we have our own lives too. Sort of.

Eddie Izzard was in town a few weeks ago and I went with Jacquie. We had nosebleed seats at the Hollywood Bowl. But Eddie is AMAZEBALLS and did a Q&A for the cheap seats about an hour before the show started. Wonderful guy.


Then Kurt and I got tickets to see a Texas Rangers game at Dodger Stadium. They were playing the Dodgers, FYI. We haven't been to a baseball game in about 10 years. It was fun for a while then the game turned out to be a pitchers duel (but not even a very good one) and at the bottom of the ninth, the score was 0-0. UGH. (I know, I know, fair weather fan.)

We left to avoid the crowd and listened as the Dodgers won with a walk-off balk! What is that, you say? (Because I had to be educated...) Click Here.

But we got to eat Dodger Dogs and eat peanuts and I had beer. I rarely have beer but I felt beer was necessary. Okay not necessary but traditional. I was also pleased/surprised to find we got to sing Take Me Out To The Ballpark at the 7th inning stretch, not America The Beautiful (or whatever 'Murican song that has to be sung to say F You to terrorists). Happy to hear that tradition has returned. Oh and we got to do the wave. Silly good times. I'd like to go back for another game.


Before it turned into a snooze-fest - HERE WE RANGERS, HERE WE GO!


I've always been bummed that I didn't grow up with a home team of any kind. I love that Kurt has his love/hate relationship with the Rangers. I would love to have Harper have a team, so maybe in a few years we can start educating her and going to more Dodger games..?? We'll see if she's into it. Kurt can be play-by-play and I can do color commentary: "Now he has two balls."

PS Waaaaaay before I was born, my dad used to recreate baseball games for the radio in Hawaii. That would have been really cool to hear him do.



The Best Feeling In The World

This blog post is not going to be about what you think it's going to be about.

In college I was on the crew team (Go Lions!) and we had to wake up "dark and surly" for practise every morning. Usually around 5:15 to get there at 5:30. One year we had to be at the boathouse at 5am every day so we were waking up at 4:45...but I think that was the year we were West Coast Varsity Lightweight 8 Champs, so it was worth it.

But I digress.

We use to talk about the best feeling in the world and that was: waking up in the middle of the night, thinking your alarm was about to go off (at 4:45) but looking at the clock and seeing that it was only 2:30. Oh that feeling of HOORAY! I CAN SLEEP FOR TWO MORE HOURS! It was almost like we wanted to wake up accidentally a few hours early to get that feeling.

The worst feeling? Waking up two minutes before your alarm went off, thinking it was 2:30.

I thought of this this morning because I woke up about two minutes before my alarm and I thought it was still about 3am. Alas no.

Movie Stars and Me

Very rarely does this happen. The only reason I have a photo with Liev Schreiber is because I worked on Kate and Leopold in 2001 and went to the wrap party. Both Liev and some other guy...what was his name...Oh yeah, Hugh Jackman were there, both super nice, chatty with all, took photos, etc. (I do have a picture with Hugh, but it's somewhere in a box and I don't have the energy to find/scan it. Not sure why I have scanned this one...)


In my normal every day general "fan" life, I would never ask an actor for a photo or autograph. I have been known to say to an actor that I adore how much I love their work. But I never bother them when eating or if they are talking with friends or family or having a personal moment. For example, I saw Elliott Gould at my local Whole Foods in the produce section and very quietly said, "I love your work, you make me laugh, so sorry to bother you!" and he said, "No bother, thank you so much, that's great!" I did a similar thing with Allison Janney while she waited for her coffee order at a counter at the Grove. She was so sweet and kind and I was in and out in 20 seconds. I figure, if I'm not intruding at all, who doesn't want to hear that they are loved and adored? I had it happen to me recently in Belfast (okay, not "loved and adored" so much) -- and it felt GREAT.

Okay, wait. I *have* asked for autographs four times in my life but they were always for other people. 

1) 1988 - Michael Jordan was filming a Nike commercial in our gym at LMU (where the lakers would sometimes practice) and I happened to be walking across the parking lot as he was walking to his car with a large group of followers. I thought -- oh I should get his autograph for my boyfriend (who was a HUGE basketball fan, probably still is). Then I thought -- no, too many people around. Then I thought -- when will I have this chance again? So I opened a notebook to a blank page, jammed my way to the front of the crowd and just held the book in front of Michael who had a pen already. He just signed it and moved on to the next piece of paper. I gave the autograph to the boyfriend and I hope he liked it because I can't remember what he said or did.

2) 1988 - James Worthy came into the restaurant I worked at (Italy's Little Kitchen "Hi, two? Smoking or non?") and I am about 80% sure I also go his autograph for the same basketball loving boyfriend.

3) 1995 - Shaquille O'Neal was the star of my 2nd VFX producing job -- that's right people, I worked on Kazaam! He was freely signing basketballs for anyone, everyone. When my chiropractor found out I was working with Shaq, she said her 12 year old son LOVED him so I got Shaq to sign a ball for him. 

4) 2007 - Dog The Bounty Hunter was in Toys-R-Us in Culver City (no, I'm not making that up) and I was laughing as the show is a guilty pleasure of a good friend of mine. So I got his autograph and he proved his great intellect by asking how to spell "Sarah". And not just "is there an h at the end" but he wrote the S and then looked up at me, confused. So I continued, "A, R, A, H." Oy. Sarah did find it amusing. 

Somehow it's mostly basketball related. Funny that.

Anyway the whole reason I even wrote this blog post is because a friend on Twitter commented that a guy who looks like Liev just came into her office and she swooned. 

Go Tonga!

The Tongan national rugby team is staying in my hotel here in Belfast. Most of you are thinking -- kay, so? Yes, rugby players tend to be larger gentlemen. If you are from Hawaii you are with me right now, smirking at the word "larger." The Tongans are HUGE. 

Here's a picture I ganked from The Daily Mail.

This would give me pause before a match.


Go Tonga!

Happy February!

Goldstar Watching the big game today, but just for something to do with Kurt and his mom on a Sunday. I'm always happy to watch for the commercials. I have just finished making the chili -- the recipe my mom has made ever since I can remember. I always loved it when she pulled out the HUGE pot that fit over two burners. That meant a LOT of people were coming over and fun would be soon at hand. I am also making hot artichoke dip. The word "artichoke" is misleading as really the best part is the hot mayo and parmesan cheese. YUM! There will be regular M&Ms for Kurt as well as his favorite: Lay's BBQ potato chips. And veggies to munch on as well. Can't be completely without fresh food! Secretly, I was so excited about having the hot artichoke dip that I had to jump around. I haven't made it/had it in ages and oh boy will it be yummy. I am hungry too but Kurt's mom will be here in an hour so I don't want to fill up on something else before the dip is ready. I compromised with a few pistachios.

Goldstar Had my yearly eye exam, the one with full dilation and close up inspection. My eyesight is still 20/20, thank the gods, and my eye doctor tells me every year that I'll need glasses soon. I keep being prepared for it, but then it's still all good. My eyes are also very healthy. Yay.

Goldstar I bought treats for certain college aged people...they prolly don't read my blog, but I'll not say what it is just in case. They will be out in the mail in a few days.

Goldstar I'm hankering for a road trip. My mom might be in No. Cal in a few weeks and if so I'll drive up and take photos along the way. It's tough when Kurt is working so hard, but we are trying to make time to go to the Grand Canyon. Item #8 that you didn't know about me: I've never been.

Goldstar Saftey Graphic Fun is rolling along. I love the images that others send in. They make me laugh outloud. The one from yesterday is especially funny. Stupid hats. Every day is a new experience/experiment with this blog and all the traffic. I'm loving it!